The LaFace Christmas Album, Ranked

It's mid-December, which means we're several weeks into non-stop mentions of snowfall, laughter and joy on our favorite radio stations.  Christmas is here and with it comes its music that is more like a bad houseguest than a mood setter-- fun, then boring and by week two you wish it'd go away for another 11 months.

1993's A LaFace Family Christmas is the soulful cynic's answer to tired holiday classics.  With tracks from TLC and Toni Braxton, it wasn't short on star power.  However, the debut of two high school students beginning their multi-platinum rap careers is what really puts this album over the top.  It's 90s Atlanta to the tee, which means 37 minutes of a refreshingly unique take on what was an otherwise bland genre.  Here are its tracks, ranked.

1. Outkast, Players Ball

Where it all started for two music icons.  Big Boi and Dre's first track fully demonstrates the authenticity that made their act wildly successful.  Mentions of Greenbriar, Underground and East Point/College Park/Decatur/ the S.W.A.T.S. said "welcome to Atlanta" before other rappers did it in a much less clever way.  Their cool nonchalance towards typical holiday traditions was exactly what we should have gotten from southern teenage rappers doing a Christmas song.  My personal favorite this time of year.

2. TLC, Sleigh Ride

 I imagine this song is what LaFace's brass had in mind when the idea for a Christmas album was first pitched.  TLC's version of Sleigh Ride could be the most under-appreciated Christmas song of all time.  T-Boz's vocals make you forget how goofy the lyrics are ("ring-ting-ting-a-ling"), while Left Eye's original raps take it beyond cover status.

3. Usher, This Christmas 

Knowing that L.A. Reid probably broke ever child labor law to get a 14-year-old Usher to finish this song makes you appreciate it more.  It's also one of the better versions of a song that's been covered so many times that it's borderline public domain (FYI, Donny Hathaway did the original).  Most likely to be performed in the car by your tone deaf friend.

4. A Few Good Men, Interlude: Christmas is Here

I can't understand why someone hasn't used this in a commercial (no Youtube video, but here's the link on Spotify).  I'm buying the rights before K-Mart does and has so much success that people other than my dad actually start shopping there again.

5. A Few Good Men, Silver Bells

Not many frills.  Just a souped up version of a classic, but it works really well.  Safe to play around your conservative co-workers at the office holiday party.

6. McArthur, Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas

See above.  Sounds like they heard Sinatra's version while waiting in line for the Pink Pig at Rich's and said "yeah... but what if one of us sang it?"

7. TLC, All I Want for Christmas

I think they recorded this after they found out their contracts with Pebbles were bogus.  TLC's version has nothing to do with Mariah Carey's of the same name which, sorry to say it here, is incomprehensibly better. Left Eye saves this one from falling to the B-side/unreleased version.

8. Toni Braxton, The Christmas Song

I wish they'd have put some sleigh bell noises over Unbreak My Heart instead of settling for this. Not bad, but wastes the incredible talent of Braxton.  LaFace co-founder Kenneth "Babyface" Edmonds must have thought the same because he released his own version a few years later.  This music's version of Michael Jordan leaving the Wizard's front office to put himself back on the court.

9. A Few Good Men, Merry Christmas My Dear

This is a stereotype of the every R&B song from '92-'95 you've ever heard.  All our favorite tropes are there. Started off fine, then somehow turned into a sappy "please take me back" ballad. It even has a bass heavy spoken word part like all songs from this era did (it's bad).  An R.Kelly-esque completely random "woo!" is thrown in because 90s. So ridiculous that I want to play it over and over again on Spotify, which is ironically beneficial to all those involved in creating this parody of a black Christmas tune.

Happy Holidays!

One Please: I went to the movies alone

Living in a small town means there's never bad traffic.

Now that I've said something positive about my current situation, I can talk real.  Living in a small town means everyone you know also works with you.  It means that any store, restaurant or moderate convenience that the civilized world has had for years doesn't arrive until it's old.  It also means that the anticipation of the arrival of anything new coming to town lasts for months.  You haven't seen excited until you've seen local scuttlebutt about a new Bojangles last for months.

It goes without saying that I'd like to permanently leave Small Town, USA.  Until then, mini vacations to the nearest town with a Publix have to suffice.  My original plan was to catch the Georgia National Fair.  Then, this kind of changed my mind:

In an effort to continue my streak of not looking like a creep, I figured I'd catch a movie instead.  And with that, my Saturday was booked for Denzel Washington's new thriller The Equalizer".  I was relieved to see that he finally stopped doing train movies, so I had to check it out.  I hopped in the truck and headed to make the 1PM show.  As usual, I was late.

My first thought standing in line: "I wonder if they'll card me?" ....nope.  I guess it's good that I don't look 17 anymore (?) but still, I also didn't actually start feeling older until recently.  I think most new music is hot garbage and can't understand what kids see when they dress themselves in the morning.  Nevertheless, one thing that hasn't changed about me since high school: I loves me a good bargain.  I would've been content paying $7.75 to watch No Holds Barred, but that low of a price to see the new Denzel picture was foolishness. 

I live life on the cheap.  However, I caught a good price on a ticket so it was no thing to throw another dollar or two on some snacks.  Failed by 2014 fashion (pockets on slim fit jeans are useless), I couldn't discreetly sneak in a pack of gum, let alone candy or soda.  After seeing the concession prices, I'd wish that I had.  A small popcorn and Coke was going to set me back $12.  No sir.  I swallowed my pride, then handed over my grown-man card in exchange for one Kids Snack box: a handful of day-old popcorn, fun sized gummies and two sips of soda they had the nerve to pour into a cup.  It cost $5.75.

I made it inside Auditorium #1 right as the movie began.  I won't spoil the plot, save for my Facebook review.  Even more entertaining was the running commentary and laugh track from the locals sharing the experience with me.  Their lack of regard for theater etiquette reminded me of seeing movies with my aunt and sister at the old Magic Johnson Theater in Atlanta.

The patrons were as much a part of the show as the actual movie.  The antics of this day's bunch included:

• -The aforementioned non-stop laughter that got louder each time a derivation of the f-bomb was dropped
• -The laughter that continued anytime someone was shot
• -An insightful dialogue between a couple behind me that provided context to the film's more complicated scenes.  Example: (Bad guy hands someone an envelope of cash)

 Guy: See, he just gave him some money.
 Girl:  ... (suddenly has an ephiphany)... oh!

This lasted two hours.  

The conclusion of my lonely personal date was fairly mundane.  The movie ended and I went back to my single life in a small town with nothing for people like me.  Despite dropping back into this sobering reality, I can take solace in knowing that surviving this season of my life is possible.  Actually, it's pretty easy.  Mini-vacations give you a much needed break from the binding grind of a regular schedule.  Taking time do something fun for yourself, by yourself allows a greater capacity to take in the world around you; laughing at the flaws of your present reality is a fun way to deal with a difficult in-the-meantime circumstance.  

Image Conscience

I visited a high school today.  The experience started out as dull as that sentence.  I see dozens of high school for work and they all look the same. However, fighting against the grain of monotony stood a champion of all things unique who's presence punched average square in the jaw.

I arrived in the middle of an early class period and walked the halls, empty save for a few loitering kids and the teachers hunting them, and was greeted by a gentleman in a shirt and tie who seemed happy to have me there.  His appearance and welcoming demeanor (the receptionist I checked in with must have had eye lids made of lead because she never once looked up even after I said hello) suggested that he was someone important around campus.

Throughout the day I saw counselors, teachers and coaches in casual clothing, so I figured the guy in business attire was well above their pay grade.  You can imagine how shocked I was when I saw him spend four lunch periods holding a broom and dustpan.  The man in the shirt and tie wasn't the principal; he was the janitor.

I've never completely neglected personal appearance.  However I must admit, khakis stay in my regular rotation while any actual dress pants might as well be encased in glass marked "break open only when they're making you wear them".

I always thought that "dressing for the job you want" sounded nice on paper but would lead to awkward moments.  Think along the lines of a fry cook showing up for his lunch shift in a tuxedo.
The overdressed janitor, to his credit, changed my view.  My perception of him and the influence he carried was completely shaped by his intentionally professional appearance.

We only had a brief exchange, but what if something more had been at stake?  How much of an advantage would neat attire play in a more meaningful situation?  Does the immediate respect garnered by those with kempt looks, good eye contact and a firm handshake open the door to conversations that lead to breakthrough?  Phillipians 4:9 says "And my God will meet all your needs according to the riches of his glory in Christ Jesus."  I believe God provides opportunity, but we have a responsibility to maintain readiness for receiving such favor.  I don't want to risk losing a blessing because I didn't feel like ironing.

Don't let the networking opportunity you've been praying for go to someone else who took time to brush their hair.  Don't be shocked if your potential husband/wife walk right past because you walked out the house with chapped lips and ashy elbows.   Admittedly, unrelated biases are often at work and many of them are out of our control.  That's why it's important to take something that we can personally handle, like appearance, and do our best to stay on top of it whenever possible.  Your breakthrough could hang in the balance.

Another RE2PECT Article: Life Lessons from Derek Jeter

In case you hate sports haven't heard, New York Yankees shortstop Derek Jeter is retiring from baseball.  For those around my age Jeter's significance as a popular culture figure is matched by only a handful of other athletes.  I grew to love the Yankees of the late 90s and 00s mostly because he always stood in great contrast to his peers.  In a sport full of squares he had more swagger than anyone else, always looking smooth without having to flex.

Jeter's career ends this weekend after 14 All-Star games, five World Series titles and (by my count) 2 would-be MVPs ('99, '06) that steroid users and anti-Yankee voters stole from him.  From twenty seasons of great plays, I submit these as the ones that represent him best. They also give us a guide for life's common problems. 

2004 ALDS, Game 2: Jeter sprints home to score 

Jeter races home on a shallow line drive, risking watching Twins' outfielder Jacque Jones easily throw him out.  Jones is half-paying attention and the Yankees win the game.  

The lesson: Be bold and take chances.  Play life to win rather than to not lose.  Sometimes you'll get thrown out, but other times you catch your opposition napping.  

2001 ALDS, Game 3: Jeter improvises, nails runner at home 

Sprinting out of position to pick off a bad throw from right fielder Shane Spencer, Jeter shovels it home himself to prevent the tying run from scoring.  Still "one of the best plays..." we've ever seen from a shortstop.  

The lesson: Life's plans are futile; they never follow the script we write.  Don't allow fear or stubbornness to stop you from making unconventional adjustments to meet your goals.

Jeter's Jump Throw

Jeter's signature play is physically impossible for most other humans.  Even pros can't muster the agility and strength it takes to pull off this kind of movement.  If you need one piece of evidence to show someone why Jeter was far better than the average ball player, this is it. 

The lesson:  Find your signature- whatever it is that you can do better than most other people- and own it.  Standing out from the crowd keeps the world from getting too boring.  In your #stupid20s, it could also help you get a great job or a date.  

2001 World Series, Game 4: Jeter wins it in extras

The Yankees were trailing the Arizona Diamondbacks 3-1 in this game and were down to their final out before a game tying home run extended the contest into early morning hours.  Jeter finished off the unlikely comeback with a home run that just made it over the right field wall.

The lesson: I'll swagger jack another famous Yankee: it ain't over 'til it's over.  We'll often find ourselves up against perceived deadlines on goals or milestones with little hope of reaching them in time.  Fighting until the end and allowing extra time when necessary helps us squeak out improbable victories.  

Jeter hits game winner in Yankee Stadium finale

After a disappointing year that saw his team miss the playoffs and his personal statistics drop greatly, Jeter finishes his last home game in an incredible way: he delivers a single to right field to end the game and, for all practical purposes, his career. 

The lesson: We live in a broken world where violence, prejudice and hatred exist and sometimes thrive.  In the midst of all that, good things still happen.  Don't relinquish hope for the end of a bad season you're experiencing.  You could miss out on a good finish.  

Lecrae (finally) sits down with The Breakfast Club

Happy Friday!  Kick your weekend off with this interview from a guy who's influenced me to actually buy a CD for the first time in about five years.  I didn't know if would ever happen, but Lecrae sat down with Hot 105.1's The Breakfast Club and talked about what it means to rap as a Christian, without being a "Christian rapper".  Also, check out Vibe's review of his new album Anomaly.   You should also see what the people are saying on Amazon.

The Rejection All-Stars

Rejection is a part of life, and a great deal of it seems to come in your 20s.  From dates to jobs, the "no's" outweigh the "yes's" like a sumo wrestler outweighs a backup dancer.   Getting turned down isn't the end of the world, though.  Sometimes it's the beginning of a whirlwind journey to success.  History is littered with greats who were told they weren't good enough.  Because they persevered after getting declined like a bad credit card, these individuals are recognized in my list of Rejection All-Stars.

Jim Carrey

The comedian who emerged as a star in the 1990s from lead roles in Ace Ventura: Pet Detective and The Mask wasn't heralded early in his career.  He auditioned for the 1980-81 season of Saturday Night Live and didn't get the job.  You've probably never heard of The Duck Factory, the 1984 sitcom featuring Carrey in his first lead role, because it was canceled after only one season.

Kurt Warner

Many teens get their first taste of employment as grocery baggers.  Before leading teams to three Super Bowls and winning NFL MVP, Warner did it as a 20-something pro football flameout after getting cut by the Green Bay Packers.  Failing at the highest level is line thing; doing so in small college football can bring a greater level of discouragement.  Before his initial NFL hopes were crushed, Warner rode the bench for three years and contemplated quitting the team at Division 1-AA Northern Iowa before becoming the starter his senior year.

Steven Spielberg

The Director of E.T the Extra-Terrestrial, Jurassic Park and Saving Private Ryan applied to the University of Southern California's prestigious School of Theater, Film and Television twice and was denied admission both times.  Now, his filmography has its own Wikipedia page.

Everyone faces closed doors.  Keep knocking and eventually you'll find the that's open.

"Just like that... the sun come out": The Other Side of Life's Storms

Just the other day, I saw God can provide hope in the middle of life's down seasons.

I had to make a 3 hour drive across the state as part of regular work travel.  Spending eight hours in the office followed by even more time in the car makes a long day much harder.

After coasting through about 50 miles of sunshine, I ran into a storm unexpectedly.  This was one of those downpours Forrest Gump talked about in Vietnam with "rain that flew in sideways" and "come straight up from underneath", which made it impossible to see any form of daybreak on the horizon.

Not wanting to waste any additional time after leaving late, I gradually drove my way through the pouring rain and suddenly (again, like in Forrest Gump)... it stopped.  What happened next inspired this post.  The clouds disappeared, the sun came out and the biggest rainbow I've ever seen draped the once dreary sky.  Only minutes had passed since I was pushing my car through what felt like a monsoon.  Yet before I knew it, the storm was over.

To put this in a more abstract context:

1. Easy, sunny drive (college!)
2. Driving in the middle of a storm (bad outcomes in the search for a career I love)
3. I can't see any way out (countless applications with no response, interviews followed up with bad news)
4. I keep driving through the storm (persistence in applying despite no obvious leads on the way)
5. The storm is suddenly over (hopefully, this happens next. And soon.)

Apply this to whatever you're struggling with today.  Keep driving through the storm.  There's a rainbow on the other side.

Judgment Draft: What Your Fantasy Football Picks Reveal About Your Life

I can gauge a lot from a person's appearance, handshake and top fantasy football pick.  Here's a quick guide to what someone's choice in the first round says about them.

Peyton Manning

A future Hall of Fame QB who produced the most fantasy points in the NFL last season and is always a sure bet to give players well above average numbers

You like name value.  Established brands in clothing, cars or electronics are always garner your purchase. Playing it safe means you'll seldom find a bargain, discover new restaurants or meet interesting people.  Nevertheless, taking the road most traveled still serves as your number one strategy for success.

• Job you'll have: Senior Account Executive at a company we've all heard of but aren't excited about.
• Who you'll marry: The high school/college steady who's held you down for years through good times and bad times.  You'll parent 2.5 kids plus a dog.

Johnny Manziel

The Heisman winning, polarizing QB may still have a lot to learn before dominating the pros

You know enough about sports to hold a short conversation without sounding clueless, but not enough to say anything meaningful beyond "did you see ______ yesterday.?" Facts like Johnny Manziel riding the bench indefinitely weren't mentioned in the 15 seconds you listened to sports talk during your morning commute. In most cases, you didn't actually see ______ do anything yesterday, the week before or ever.  Your desire to gain acceptance without doing a shred of the leg work will prove costly.

• Job you'll have: Hotel Guest Services Agent.  Your ability to fake real knowledge in a number of areas will make you master of front desk check-in small talk.
• Who you'll marry: The guy/girl you saw at the one party... well actually you just heard they were there... you eventually Facebook chatted... nobody really knows how you ended up together.

Giovanni Bernard

This second year RB  was a fan favorite on HBO's Hard Knocks and has the potential to breakout this season. Makes millions but drives a used mini-van, because irony is the best policy 

Everyone thinks you're the coolest guy in the room.  At least everyone else in the room who really knows what's new and cutting edge.  The term trendy is an insult to you. Something isn't trendy until everyone's doing it, and by then you've moved on.  Your thinking isn't common.  You're not trendy; you're next level.

• Job you'll have: You don't have a job; you have interests.  This doesn't earn you much money, but it's a good excuse for selling all of your possessions to live in one of those cost-saving mini-houses.
• Who you'll marry: The who doesn't matter as much as the how.  Anyone who agrees to a minimalist ceremony in an urban setting where everyone is barefoot and craft beer is served during the toast is a keeper.

Jimmy Graham

A TE who's offensive stats are normal for an elite player, but rank well above everyone else at his position

While most of us aim for the biggest prize, you think in more modest terms.  You just want to be better than the person next to you.  Big fish + small pond= happiness.

• Job you'll have: Co-host for a small market morning news show.  Nothing incredible on its own and you have contemporaries doing bigger things in tougher places.  But you know, it sure beats what most of your friends are doing.
• Who you'll marry: The guy/girl who wasn't the smartest or best looking in your freshmen class, but was head and shoulders above the other options in your English class.

Josh Gordon

A good WR who makes bad decisions

You know your stuff.  You learn from past mistakes and have successfully used them to plan out future  decisions.  You quickly consider all of your options before making a decision, always heading into  challenges well prepared.  This has put you on life's fast track: you skipped a grade, finished college in three years and got your masters in 9 months, and owned a home before you turned 25.  You finish everything ahead of your peers- including your draft prep.  Ready to win your office's keeper league and convinced that Josh Gordon is the next big thing after his monster 2013 season, you nab Gordon in a 3-for-1 deal shortly after the Super Bowl.  An idiot co-worker who rode Gordon last year's title expresses concern over his off the field issues.  The idiot was right- Gordon fails a drug test a week after your trade and could will miss the entire 2014 season. 

• Your job: Assistant to the Associate Vice Provost of Equity and Enrollment Ideas for Student Success at your alma mater.  It was the first job you were offered.
• Who you'll marry: The first person to like your next Facebook status.  Enjoy life with your 3rd grade teacher, weirdo. 

Hope you didn't take this seriously.  Happy football!

Am I There Yet? The Importance of Setbacks on the Road to Success

"It should have happened by now."

This, one of "5 Lies Every Twentysomething Needs to Stop Believing" according to Paul Angone, is the tragic phrase that's guided my life since graduation.  College taught me a lot of awesome skills and exposed me to new ideas.  One thing it failed at, and where it continues to fail today's students, is in indirectly teaching that if you follow a rubric, attain a tangible level of success and plan in far enough in advance it's easy to know exactly when you'll hit your goal. Graduation is just a checkmark on the gold paved road to success. 

In the real world, guarantees are replaced by a lot "maybes".  If you work hard, use your resources, and perform well... maybe you'll get that cool job.  Maybe you'll earn a raise.  Maybe you'll find a spouse.  Maybe your horrible boss will turn over a new leaf... or just retire. Maybe is a word that's true meaning comes full circle in life. As a child it's a kind hearted substitute for "no.  As an idealistic 18-22 year old, it becomes the great ray of hope  for eventual triumph.  When we enter the workforce, we revert back to childhood and figure out that in many cases, "maybe" turns out to mean "no."

I can work hard to escape the mundane life I feel trapped in, yet still have no assurances of when or even if I'll find a way to break through.  This is the biggest punch in the gut I've gotten since entering the workforce.  After a recent setback, I wondered what the point of even trying was.  After another email wishing me the best of luck in my future endeavors, I got down on my knees, bowed my head to pray and said "Okay, God.  I understand.  I guess this is the best I'm ever going to get." I don't know anyone who's ever been left at the altar once, yet I feel like I can empathize with someone who's been jilted ten times.  

We can't plan out every step of our lives.  Frustrating as it is to accept, we won't always (or maybe even ever) get exactly what we want at the precise moment we want it.  The "if this, then that" principle works great in an Excel spreadsheet, but life isn't a batch of numbers with precise calculations and probabilities. 

College allowed me to thrive in an idealistic setting.  I knew that if I studied hard, when graduation rolled around I'd get rewarded with a degree.  But when I reflect on those years, it's the process of getting to graduation that I remember most.  Scavenging for loose dollars to order chinese with other broke friends, studying hours just to pass an exam, spending hours on a project only to find out (the hard way) why hitting save is so important; it was the struggle that made the payoff worth it.  Instantly receiving what I was working for without the long nights and failures would have rendered graduation meaningless. The degree itself means nothing-- it's framed piece of overpriced paper.  It's the work behind getting it that means the most.  It reminds me that I can get knocked down, yet still manage to get up enough times to see my goals come to fruition.  

When we set out to accomplish a dream, struggles along the way will throw us around and tear us down before we rise above the challenges to emerge victorious.  Growing frustrated because it hasn't happened yet only robs you of the growth and maturation that come along the way.  Don't worry about when the finish will come-- get through everything now to ensure that it will. 

The Perks of Living Young and Broke

Living Single didn't look like this.

Just like many people my age, I enjoy sports.  Having long given up on the dream of playing professionally, my sports high comes from watching games rather than playing them.  Here's where living the young (i.e. financially challenged) post-college life is really not letting Bryan be Bryan.

Sports are on cable.  Cable is expensive.  Jobs that you get shortly after college typically don't allow for much flexibility when it comes to these luxuries.  So I've made several sacrifices, most of which are negatively impacting Sallie Mae more than me, in order to get my baseball, football and basketball fix.  But it's still. not. enough.  This season's HBO's Hard Knocks features my Atlanta Falcons and my already stretched budget can't afford the extra charge for premium channels.  So while the rest of Georgia blissfully watches the birds' grunt, hit and curse their way through training camp, I'm forced to find other options for Tuesday night time killing.

Most 20-somethings are faced with giving up a pleasure because of the newly found constraints of adulthood, many of which come from just not having the disposable income we were used to in high school and college.  This, on the surface, is a bad thing.  However, there are always ways to turn time away from cable/ dining out/ shopping into productive activity that could change your life for the better.  Here are a few good options to choose:

Exercise

This doesn't require an expensive gym membership.  At 23, I trained to run my first 10k using running shoes and gym clothes already in my closet.  The only money I spent came during the race registration, months after started prepping at local parks and scenic streets throughout town.  By this time, I had already reached my fitness goals and was in much better shape whether I was going to run the race or not.

Read... a book!

...from the library! That big building I never wanted to visit after undergrad became broke 20-something heaven for me once I discovered all the free reading I could do.  Amazon isn't necessary when you not only have your choice of books, but also movies to pick from without paying a cent.

Experiential building

This is one of those fancy phrases that the thousands of dollars I spent on college helped me come up with.  It really just means "do new stuff."  There are organizations that, just like you, don't have much extra money to spend.  Utilize them for volunteer opportunities that can give you a great way to kill dead time, build up your resume for the job you really want and -most importantly- help others.

Cook at home

You have to eat.  Do it while saving money and building skills that will impress your future spouse.  

I've learned that your 20s aren't going to provide peak earning years, that doesn't mean they don't offer great value.

Your Business Card is Worthless: Why No Job Can Ever Define You

It's cool that even in 2014, business cards are still useful.  We can find out a lot about someone- their name, what they do, how to contact them- on a piece of scrap paper about half the size of a baseball card.  They're given out quickly after we meet someone we think is worth knowing or keeping touch with.  In an age where most information is obtained digitally, business cards have refused to die with the rest of hard copy.  They're amazing- a gateway to our future, that gives us info on the present, all on a medium that speaks to the past.

That last paragraph is literary exaggeration.  Business cards don't really tell us much at all.  They're cliff notes to our jobs which, despite cultural obsession with finding the "right" one, aren't even meant to tell our entire story.  At worst, jobs merely provide money.  At best, they are a tool for us to accomplish what we're really here for- hammers used to build the structures that house relationships that make life worth going through. No matter the salary, location or function, even a good job can't show someone who you truly are.

I prayed for understanding of this abstract idea, and found that my father embodies it well.   My dad invented "life hacks" before I ever saw a single internet meme.  When I didn't have access to university counseling services, he was the best confidant in town- available 24/7 and ready to listen to incessant complaining for forever.  The man who always stood tall as guardian of his household was also an expert peacemaker, quelling even the worst of battles I had with my sister- the greatest rival I'll ever know.  When I thought 18 years of this had bled him dry of every nurturing bone in his body,  I'd come home for holiday breaks to see my dad do these same things for my younger cousins.  The man was helping out other people's kids, too!  Amazing.  And none of it had anything to do with his job.

Here's one of the best lessons my dad has taught me: the person you are is not directly tied to where you work.  Sure, I think his best character traits are appreciated by a lot of people he works with: he's resourceful, caring, and helps those in need.  But that's just who he is, and it's who he would be no matter what he did for a living.  His legacy isn't based on career accomplishments, but what he's done to help others.

This isn't meant as an indictment against ambition.  This is a warning against finding your whole identity in a job.  Until recently, I tried to grade my life based on where my talents placed me professionally.  It's a selfish way of thinking that's, ironically, self-destructive.  Even if you reach the pinnacle of your professional goals, there's always difficult co-workers, a lack of appreciation and the potential for burnout that come along with having any job (just ask every living U.S. President).  Our identities rest in what we can do relationally: giving, encouraging, teaching, serving, etc.  Jobs provide places where we can go to share those gifts and an audience to share them with.  They are only a part of our life story; an epic with an infinite word count that a business card could never contain.

Fatigue, indeed: The Cure For a Hopeless Job Search

I have a love/hate deal going on with indeed.com.  It's a complicated matter.  Indeed is valuable tool until you realize the entire planet is using for the same reason you are- to get the heck out of your miserable job and start an awesome new career.  If the "one search. all jobs." tool worked like a Coke machine, we'd all dance in the streets.  Just tap the screen for the one you like, and boom- out of your drab office and into the place where God really wants you to work.

Unfortunately, we all know applying for jobs isn't that easy.  It takes effort to sort through each listing, ruling out prospective gigs because they're not in the right city or don't come with a good salary, until you finally stumble upon the good stuff. Once you find the few that feel right, you take time to submit a resume, cover letter (which I find redundant.  Does anyone ever say that they don't want a job at your company because they're inexperienced, lazy and unavailable to talk to?) and whatever else they need to see that you're the right hire.

In most cases, this work bears no fruit.  You don't get hired and wonder whether anyone even glanced at the materials you spent hours perfecting.  Maybe someone does and actually invites you to visit for an interview (what?!).  You then get to burn valuable sick time spending an entire day in uncomfortable clothes answering the same five questions to eight groups of people whose titles and job descriptions seem to vary to the point of absurdity... and you don't get the job.  Neither of these scenarios is very fun.

Here's how you deal with getting worn down from the disappointment of a lack of success in the job hunt:

Take heart
When the search is going slow or an interview goes wrong, we start to feel that getting over the hump and landing a new job is impossible.  Whether you love or hate your current employer, remember this: someone thought enough of you to make an offer.   Even if you're unemployed, at some point in your life someone has shown that you were worthy of merit: graduating high school, getting admitted to college, getting a date, etc.  It's likely that good times will come around again.

Job offers are based in opinion
There's no way that someone without a medical degree would receive a job offer at a reputable hospital; there are minimum requirements that you'll have to meet for consideration of any job.  However, once you've met the basics and land an interview, all facts go out the window.  Search committees are then focused on you- your personality, what you wear, even how long you talk.  This means that every job offer you do or don't receive comes down to opinions.  As we all should know, humans are fickle.  The slightest gesture could instantly change an employers opinion of you for the better or worse.  Sometimes it's obvious; other times it's not.  There's no point in stressing or devaluing your self-image over it.  Inevitably, someone has to lose out after a pool of interviews are conducted.  When other qualified candidates are in the running, getting selected is sometimes out of our hands. The outcome is a crapshoot.  The best way to beat the volatile nature of this process leads into the next point.

Keep playing or you'll never win
You've succeeded before and realize that sometimes receiving a job offer is a roll of the dice.  The only way to absolutely ensure that not a single company ever gives you the call you've waited on is to not bother applying at all.  My mind is frequently polluted with the "what's the point, it'll never work" voice.  This is a flat out lie.  The facts remain that someone is getting hired for the job you submitted to.  That means someone who could've ruled themselves out in the beginning by allowing discouragement to creep in eventually won out.  Go in knowing that there's a chance this might not end with you putting in notice at your current job, but that the only way it will is if you try.

Enjoy life along the way
Life is short.  Finding meaningful work is important, but a job search that usually takes considerable shouldn't receive all of your energy.  Go hangout with friends and family.  Take a break to watch movie.  Play video games.  Don't let the job search rule your life.  The best way to deal with where you are is to find contentment.  I think finding activities you enjoy is one of the best ways to deal with the present while enduring the wait for the future.

How an All-Pro's Failure Can Help You Find the Right Career

“Everybody is a genius. But if you judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree, it will live its whole life believing that it is stupid.”

-Albert Einstein 

Stupid is how we feel anytime we're forced into a job  that lies outside our strengths.  The excuse of "it's my first day/week/month" expires before you realize that you're really not cut out for that line of work.  I think many of us just starting out in the post-college, "you must find your dream job ASAP" world are feeling this especially.  But what if what Einstein says is true, and we're all just fish trying to climb trees?  What would that look like?

Emmitt Smith was a terrible television analyst. Think of watching an inexperienced anchor on a small market, low budget evening news broadcast, then imagine them reading off a teleprompter that was covered in grease. That's how uncomfortable Smith looked as he desperately tried to recap a game we'd all just watched. However, outside of his brief stint in TV, his overall body of work:

• Pro Football Hall of Fame Class of 2010
• The NFL's all-time leader in rushing yards 
• Three time Super Bowl champion 

Those are just the highlights. That is, the three big accomplishments he'd mention in the "summary" section near the top. He could fill out the rest with:

• MVP of Super Bowl XXVIII
• Eight Pro Bowl selections 
• Four time All-Pro 

Emmitt Smith gave us a great idea of what happens when a genius in is placed out of their element. The calamity that ensues leaves no idea of the aptitude the individual has for greatness, albeit in another line of work. 

So if Smith could do perform so well in one profession and so poorly in another, it's reasonable to assume that we're wired similarly. If you're a bad cashier, that doesn't mean you wouldn't make an excellent dance instructor.  If your job in the corporate world isn't going well, maybe you'd make a great youth pastor.  That terrible waiter at your favorite restaurant could find great success as a graphic designer. One person's nightmare is another's dream job.  

If you're performing somewhere between average and awful at your day job, it doesn't preclude you from greatness in another area. The daily struggle of just trying to make it through another day can make us oblivious to that fact. By all means, do your best at wherever you've been placed at the moment. But if your best in that area doesn't quite measure up to greatness, remember this: the most decorated running back in NFL history was an awful TV analyst. You're not alone.  Find what you're good at and chase your dreams.

When Work Feels Like Prison: A Lesson From Shawshank

"I remember thinking it would take a man 600 years to tunnel through the wall with it. Andy did it in less than 20."
-Morgan Freeman as "Redd" in 1994's The Shawshank Redemption

Earlier this week, on a typically dismal Monday, I joked that my job was starting to feel less like an early career stopgap and more like a prison sentence.  As the week went on, I found that the parallels between the last two years of my employment-- feeling unjustly confined to a place I didn't belong, the bittersweet feeling of seeing peers leaving for a life outside these walls-- made me think about the themes presented in The Shawkshank Redemption.  Each character got to prison differently and survived in various ways, but they all shared one thing in common- everyone wanted out.  The notion that working a 9-5 job is anything like imprisonment certainly seems hyperbolic, but in some ways it's actually not.

Who doesn't think that finally leaving your dull and uninspiring day job for a dream career would feel that great?

Here's a quick recap if you haven't seen the film:

Banker Andy Drufresne is falsely convicted of murder and thus sentenced to an eternity--two life sentences-- in Shawshank Penitentiary.  Through most of the film's 142 minutes, we see Andy suffer through the hardships we've typically come to associate with prison life-- assault, embarrassment, and-- after a near legal escape is thwarted by a self-serving and ironically murderous warden--  reluctant acceptance of his ill fated circumstances.  

After serving in Shawshank for over a decade, Andy seems to find peace in his prison existence.  His rewarding job in the library and cult status amongst  fellow inmates cons viewers into thinking that the moral of the film could simply be to just make the best out of a bad situation.  For an average film, and an average life, that would suffice.  However, what makes Shawshank stand out is its incredible finish.  It's not just that Andy escapes, but how he does it, that we can all learn something from.

Andy Dufresne spent years literally chipping his way to escape.  Using a rock hammer that could probably barely chip a tooth, he gradually broke his way through the concrete wall that separated him from the outside world.  Andy didn't dwell on what should have happened; he didn't lament the life he deserved.  He chose to get active in busting his way out of prison.  

What can the everyday person toiling away in a job that they hate take from this?  Jobs can feel like an indefinite prison sentence, and in many ways they're exactly that.  You may not (and probably won't) find your way out in a day.  It will likely take much longer.  But by gradually clawing away at the massive wall between your current job and freedom, you ensure that the day of your release will indeed arrive.  

What does chipping away look like for us?  Maybe it's posting that great cake recipe you love to make at office parties as a start to selling them by the slice in a new business.  How about recording your #hotsportstakes and uploading it as a podcast? Instead of waiting to make that gift basket for a friend's birthday, try selling one to a coworker.  These are all simple steps that, if built upon through persistence, can lead to the breakthrough you've been waiting on.  Pray for God's assistance along the way through discouragement and setbacks, then watch Him help you as you help yourself.

You've probably guessed that writing this blog post was my way of starting to chip away at the wall to career freedom.  It is-- and I hope it serves as inspiration to get started yourself.